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Original Usenet thread from alt.ascii-art, started 9 May 1996.
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| | | |___  ___ _ __   ___| |_     / \   _ __ ___| |__ (_)_   _____ 
| | | / __|/ _ \ '_ \ / _ \ __|   / _ \ | '__/ __| '_ \| \ \ / / _ \
| |_| \__ \  __/ | | |  __/ |_   / ___ \| | | (__| | | | |\ V /  __/
 \___/|___/\___|_| |_|\___|\__| /_/   \_\_|  \___|_| |_|_| \_/ \___|
-=-ORDER FLOWERS FOR MOTHER'S DAY!-=-WWW SITE-=-1-888 number

-=-ORDER FLOWERS FOR MOTHER'S DAY!-=-WWW SITE-=-1-888 number-=-

alt.ascii-art · 8 messages · 9 May 1996 - 17 May 1996

Dear:
  [ ] Clueless Newbie         [ ] Lamer           [ ] AOLer
  [ ] Me too er               [ ] Perver          [ ] Geek
  [x ] Spammer                 [ ] Nerd            [ ] Elvis
  [ ] Fed                     [ ] Freak           [ ] FLAMENET 
  [ ] Other: JUST PLAIN SSTTUUPPIIDD!!!!
  
 You Are Being Flamed Because:
  [ ] You posted a "test" in a newsgroup other than alt.test
  [ ] You posted warez in pieces LESS than 5000 lines
  [ ] You posted something asking for warez sites
  [ ] You quoted an ENTIRE post in your reply
  [ ] You continued a long, stupid thread
  [x ] You started an off-topic thread
  [ ] You posted a "YOU ALL SUCK" message
  [ ] You said "me too" to something
  [x ] You don't know which group to post in
  [ ] You suck
  [ ] You brag about things that never happened
  [ ] Your sig/alias/server sucks
  [ ] You made up slang then used it in a message
  [ ] You posted a phone-sex ad
  [ ] I don't like your tone of voice
  [ ] I think you might be a fed

  
 To Repent, You Must:

  [ ] Be the PR guy for Canter & Siegel
  [ ] Give up your AOL account
  [x ] Bust up your modem with a hammer and eat it
  [x ] Jump into a bathtub while holding your monitor
  [x ] Actually post something relevant
  [ ] Read the FAQ
  [ ] Be Senator Exon's love slave
  [ ] Be the guest of honor in alt.flame for a month
  [ ] Post your tests to alt.test
  
 In Closing, I'd Like to Say:

  [ ] Blow me
  [ ] Get a life
  [x ] Never post again
  [ ] I pity your dog
  [ ] Go to hell
  [ ] Yer momma's so fat/stupid/ugly that etc...
  [x ] Take your shit somewhere else
  [ ] Learn to post or fuck off
  [ ] Do us all a favor and jump into some industrial equipment
  [ ] See how far your tongue will fit into the electric outlet
  [ ] All of the above
 
end flame.


In article <4mscao$12c...@saba.info.ucla.edu>, net...@aol.com 
(1-888-800-FLOWERS) wrote:
>1-888-800-FLOWERS
>
>Your Mother's Day Florist~!
>
>-!!   Check Out our Web-Site in Progress at:   !!-
>
>http://152.163.199.22/netflower8
>       
>Take a look at our Mother's Day Specials, and 
>
>Send Your Mother a Lovely Bouquet for Mother's Day!
>
>....you haven't forgotten, have you?
>
>Just give 1-888-800-FLOWERS a call today!
>
>It's a toll-free call within the continental United States!
>
>We are based in Los Angeles, and have special rates
>for deliveries to Taiwan and China.
>
>Worldwide Delivery, and our helpful staff will be happy
>to assist you in selecting an arrangement which
>will fit your needs AND your budget~!
>
>Call EARLY for timely delivery!
>
>Mention that you saw us on the Internet or World Wide Web
>and receive a 10% discount on your next order!
>
>Thank you for your support, and Happy Mother's Day!~    : )
>
>1-888-800-FLOWERS
>http://152.163.199.22/netflower8
>
>

Kim Ornitz 
Remote Film Sound
orn...@remotefilm.com
http://www.remotefilm.com

1-888-800-FLOWERS

Your Mother's Day Florist~!

-!!   Check Out our Web-Site in Progress at:   !!-

http://152.163.199.22/netflower8
       
Take a look at our Mother's Day Specials, and 

Send Your Mother a Lovely Bouquet for Mother's Day!

...you haven't forgotten, have you?

Just give 1-888-800-FLOWERS a call today!

It's a toll-free call within the continental United States!

We are based in Los Angeles, and have special rates
for deliveries to Taiwan and China.

Worldwide Delivery, and our helpful staff will be happy
to assist you in selecting an arrangement which
will fit your needs AND your budget~!

Call EARLY for timely delivery!

Mention that you saw us on the Internet or World Wide Web
and receive a 10% discount on your next order!

Thank you for your support, and Happy Mother's Day!~    : )

1-888-800-FLOWERS
http://152.163.199.22/netflower8

In article <4mscao$12c...@saba.info.ucla.edu>, net...@aol.com (1-888-800-FLOWERS) says:
>
>1-888-800-FLOWERS
>
>Your Mother's Day Florist~!
>
>-!!   Check Out our Web-Site in Progress at:   !!-
>
>http://152.163.199.22/netflower8
>       
>Take a look at our Mother's Day Specials, and 
>
>Send Your Mother a Lovely Bouquet for Mother's Day!
>
>...you haven't forgotten, have you?
>
>Just give 1-888-800-FLOWERS a call today!
>
>It's a toll-free call within the continental United States!
>
>We are based in Los Angeles, and have special rates
>for deliveries to Taiwan and China.
>
>Worldwide Delivery, and our helpful staff will be happy
>to assist you in selecting an arrangement which
>will fit your needs AND your budget~!
>
>Call EARLY for timely delivery!
>
>Mention that you saw us on the Internet or World Wide Web
>and receive a 10% discount on your next order!
>
>Thank you for your support, and Happy Mother's Day!~    : )
>
>1-888-800-FLOWERS
>http://152.163.199.22/netflower8
>
>
You hear a loud noise.  You turn to see a dirty man rise from the floor, with
murder in his eyes.  He lookes at you and says:

"Flowers?!"  He laughes and starts to dance.  You blink and shake your head.
He is now a dwarf in a red suit, who says, "Go Bob Go"

Some where in the back ground, a owl is heard.

jessicag <jes...@utw.com> 10 May 1996 00:00 · permalink · report
Kim ... thank you for the best laugh I have had *all* week!  I have 15 
days until my wedding ... good laughs are becoming few and far between so, 
I really appreciate it!
:)  Jessica

jes...@utw.com (jessicag) wrote:

>Kim ... thank you for the best laugh I have had *all* week!  
>I really appreciate it!
>:)  Jessica

I have to wholeheartedly agree!  But I think next  time you should
take off the gloves and really give it to them!!

jp    Water is composed of two gins, Oxygin and Hydrogin. Oxygin is pure gin.  Hydrogin is gin and water.
\\\\\\//     http://www.mindspring.com/~johnp
  (@  @)     joh...@mindspring.com
    ()       755...@compuserve.com
   {__}      JPo...@aol.com
             
             
                

orn...@remotefilm.com (Kim Ornitz) wrote:
>Dear:
>  [ ] Clueless Newbie         [ ] Lamer           [ ] AOLer
>  [ ] Me too er               [ ] Perver          [ ] Geek
>  [x ] Spammer                 [ ] Nerd            [ ] Elvis
>  [ ] Fed                     [ ] Freak           [ ] FLAMENET 
>  [ ] Other: JUST PLAIN SSTTUUPPIIDD!!!!

I dunno Kim....
I think you might have to be taken out back and shot since you quoted
the ENTIRE fucking Spam, thus propogating it even further. Learn how
to clip or paraphrase honey--you just gave 1-800-FLOWERS a few extra
days of shelf life. Besides, isn't a form letter reply also Spam???

Atomic Books, "Literary Finds for Mutated Minds"
229 W Read St, Baltimore, MD 21201 410.728.5490
Send $3 for 116 page catalog of Sleaze, Mayhem,
Freaks, Drugs, Conspiracy, Zines, Comics & more!
Visit us online at http://www.atomicbooks.com

ato...@clark.net (Atomic Books) wrote:
>orn...@remotefilm.com (Kim Ornitz) wrote:
>>Dear:
>>  [ ] Clueless Newbie         [ ] Lamer           [ ] AOLer
>>  [ ] Me too er               [ ] Perver          [ ] Geek
>>  [x ] Spammer                 [ ] Nerd            [ ] Elvis
>>  [ ] Fed                     [ ] Freak           [ ] FLAMENET 
>>  [ ] Other: JUST PLAIN SSTTUUPPIIDD!!!!
>
>I dunno Kim....
>I think you might have to be taken out back and shot since you quoted
>the ENTIRE fucking Spam, thus propogating it even further. Learn how
>to clip or paraphrase honey--you just gave 1-800-FLOWERS a few extra
>days of shelf life. Besides, isn't a form letter reply also Spam???
>
>Atomic Books, "Literary Finds for Mutated Minds"
>229 W Read St, Baltimore, MD 21201 410.728.5490
>Send $3 for 116 page catalog of Sleaze, Mayhem,
>Freaks, Drugs, Conspiracy, Zines, Comics & more!
>Visit us online at http://www.atomicbooks.com
>

No books on humour then?

Sarah Ross wrote:
> 
> ato...@clark.net (Atomic Books) wrote:
> >orn...@remotefilm.com (Kim Ornitz) wrote:
> >>Dear:
> >>  [ ] Clueless Newbie         [ ] Lamer           [ ] AOLer
> >>  [ ] Me too er               [ ] Perver          [ ] Geek
> >>  [x ] Spammer                 [ ] Nerd            [ ] Elvis
> >>  [ ] Fed                     [ ] Freak           [ ] FLAMENET
> >>  [ ] Other: JUST PLAIN SSTTUUPPIIDD!!!!
> >
> >I dunno Kim....
> >I think you might have to be taken out back and shot since you quoted
> >the ENTIRE fucking Spam, thus propogating it even further. Learn how
> >to clip or paraphrase honey--you just gave 1-800-FLOWERS a few extra
> >days of shelf life. Besides, isn't a form letter reply also Spam???
> >
> >Atomic Books, "Literary Finds for Mutated Minds"
> >229 W Read St, Baltimore, MD 21201 410.728.5490
> >Send $3 for 116 page catalog of Sleaze, Mayhem,
> >Freaks, Drugs, Conspiracy, Zines, Comics & more!
> >Visit us online at http://www.atomicbooks.com
> >
> 
> No books on humour then?hey mmaa

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