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Original Usenet message from alt.ascii-art, 12 Oct 1999.

                            
    
    
Re: How do mermaids do "the nasty" ?
    
                        


                                            

                

            

        


    

        

            

                

                    
Re: How do mermaids do "the nasty" ?

                    

                        From Ron <dst...@callamer.com>
                        · alt.ascii-art
                        · 12 Oct 1999 00:00                                                    · View full thread
                                                · report                    

                

            

        


        

            

                


            

        


        

            

                

                    

                        
I agree, this is good in a logical and poetic kinda way...

Geraldine Jones wrote:

> This is HILARIOUS!!!
>
> On Sun, 10 Oct 1999, JRO wrote:
> > frog <fro...@adelphia.net> wrote in message news:ej5M3.500$EU5...@server2.news.adelphia.net...
> > > i dunno but if they dont they're too lucky lol
> > > :And how do they ... you know ...
> > > :With no (apparent) genitals ??
> > > :.. I wonder ....
> >
> > A good question.
> >
> >     You see, the mermaid of fantasy is actually just that - a
> > fantasy. No sailor could possibly have any real use for such
> > a creature, as you, yourself, have stumbled onto this question,
> > and been unable to find an answer. Which is quite unsurprising.
> >
> >     Fortunately, I have read your cry for understanding, and
> > shall come to your rescue.
> >
> >
> >                    \\\\
> >                   .'_  `.
> >                  / / (o) \
> >                  | \_    (
> >                   \  __.'
> >                    \   (
> >                    | \ \`.
> >                    \  \ \.'
> >                     )  \ \
> >                    /. . \ \
> >                   ( _|_ / |
> >                   |  |\ ///
> >                   |  | \  \
> >                   |  )  >  )
> >                   |  | /  /
> >                   \  | ) /
> >                    ) |' (_
> >      jro          (___"-._.`.
> >
> >     Here you see a real mermaid, as they actually appear in nature. Small
> > wonder that sailors are reluctant to describe their "comely features", as
> > they have none. However, I am sure you can clearly see the distinct advantages
> > the true mermaid has over the comely, yet useless variety that has been long
> > immortalized in legend and song. Now, if you were a lonesome sailor, far from
> > home on the deep, blue sea, which would you find the most measure of comfort

> in spending a cold evening's night with?
>
>
>              .-.     .-.
>       ,ooO()/   )   (   \()Ooo.
>       |   ) |  (     )  | (   |
>       |  (  |   \   /   |  )  |
>       \   ) \_ __) (__ _/ (   /
>        `-'  .ooO() ()Ooo.  `-'
>

> >     There does come a time, after all, when blush of cheek gives way to... well,

> > you could always put a bag over her head, no? And when you return at last, to

> > your dear homeland, would you spin tales around this lass of the sea, or make
> > up ones about the "fair maids of unsurpassing beauty, without legs, but rather,
> > having perfect tails, as of fishes, in whom man can find a surfeit of longing
> > and loving"?
> >
> > JRO
>
> This is HILARIOUS!!!
>
>              //
>        .-`~\((/''-.
>      .` /    |   \ `.    *Geraldine Jones*
>     .    /0\   /0\   .  we9...@victoria.tc.ca
>     |  `.   /|\  .`  |    Happy Halloween
>      \  .         .  /
>       `.   `^^^`   .`
>         `-._.|._.-`


<!doctype html public "-//w3c//dtd html 4.0 transitional//en">
<html>
I agree, this is good in a logical and poetic kinda way...
<p>Geraldine Jones wrote:
<blockquote TYPE=CITE>
<pre>This is HILARIOUS!!!</pre>
</blockquote>

<blockquote TYPE=CITE>On Sun, 10 Oct 1999, JRO wrote:
<br>> frog &lt;fro...@adelphia.net> wrote in message <a href="news:ej5M3.500$EU5...@server2.news.adelphia.net">news:ej5M3.500$EU5...@server2.news.adelphia.net</a>...
<br>> > i dunno but if they dont they're too lucky lol
<br>> > :And how do they ... you know ...
<br>> > :With no (apparent) genitals ??
<br>> > :.. I wonder ....
<br>>
<br>> A good question.
<br>>
<br>>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; You see, the mermaid of fantasy is actually
just that - a
<br>> fantasy. No sailor could possibly have any real use for such
<br>> a creature, as you, yourself, have stumbled onto this question,
<br>> and been unable to find an answer. Which is quite unsurprising.
<br>>
<br>>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Fortunately, I have read your cry for understanding,
and
<br>> shall come to your rescue.
<br>>
<br>>
<br>>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;
\\\\
<br>>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;
.'_&nbsp; `.
<br>>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;
/ / (o) \
<br>>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;
| \_&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; (
<br>>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;
\&nbsp; __.'
<br>>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;
\&nbsp;&nbsp; (
<br>>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;
| \ \`.
<br>>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;
\&nbsp; \ \.'
<br>>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;
)&nbsp; \ \
<br>>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;
/. . \ \
<br>>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;
( _|_ / |
<br>>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;
|&nbsp; |\ ///
<br>>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;
|&nbsp; | \&nbsp; \
<br>>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;
|&nbsp; )&nbsp; >&nbsp; )
<br>>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;
|&nbsp; | /&nbsp; /
<br>>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;
\&nbsp; | ) /
<br>>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;
) |' (_
<br>>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; jro&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;
(___"-._.`.
<br>>
<br>>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; Here you see a real mermaid, as they actually
appear in nature. Small
<br>> wonder that sailors are reluctant to describe their "comely features",
as
<br>> they have none. However, I am sure you can clearly see the distinct
advantages
<br>> the true mermaid has over the comely, yet useless variety that has
been long
<br>> immortalized in legend and song. Now, if you were a lonesome sailor,
far from
<br>> home on the deep, blue sea, which would you find the most measure
of comfort</blockquote>

<blockquote TYPE=CITE>in spending a cold evening's night with?
<br>&nbsp;
<p><tt>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;
.-.&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; .-.</tt>
<br><tt>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; ,ooO()/&nbsp;&nbsp; )&nbsp;&nbsp;
(&nbsp;&nbsp; \()Ooo.</tt>
<br><tt>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; |&nbsp;&nbsp; ) |&nbsp; (&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;
)&nbsp; | (&nbsp;&nbsp; |</tt>
<br><tt>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; |&nbsp; (&nbsp; |&nbsp;&nbsp; \&nbsp;&nbsp;
/&nbsp;&nbsp; |&nbsp; )&nbsp; |</tt>
<br><tt>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; \&nbsp;&nbsp; ) \_ __) (__ _/ (&nbsp;&nbsp;
/</tt>
<br><tt>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; `-'&nbsp; .ooO() ()Ooo.&nbsp;
`-'</tt>
<br>&nbsp;</blockquote>

<blockquote TYPE=CITE>>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; There does come a time,
after all, when blush of cheek gives way to... well,</blockquote>

<blockquote TYPE=CITE>> you could always put a bag over her head, no? And
when you return at last, to</blockquote>

<blockquote TYPE=CITE>> your dear homeland, would you spin tales around
this lass of the sea, or make
<br>> up ones about the "fair maids of unsurpassing beauty, without legs,
but rather,
<br>> having perfect tails, as of fishes, in whom man can find a surfeit
of longing
<br>> and loving"?
<br>>
<br>> JRO
<p>This is HILARIOUS!!!
<p>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;
//
<br>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; .-`~\((/''-.
<br>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; .` /&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; |&nbsp;&nbsp; \ `.&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;
*Geraldine Jones*
<br>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; .&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; /0\&nbsp;&nbsp; /0\&nbsp;&nbsp;
.&nbsp; we9...@victoria.tc.ca
<br>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; |&nbsp; `.&nbsp;&nbsp; /|\&nbsp; .`&nbsp; |&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;
Happy Halloween
<br>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; \&nbsp; .&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;
.&nbsp; /
<br>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; `.&nbsp;&nbsp; `^^^`&nbsp;&nbsp; .`
<br>&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp;&nbsp; `-._.|._.-`</blockquote>
</html>




                    

                

            

        


        

            

                

                    Original message headers
                    

                        
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From: Ron <dst...@callamer.com>
Subject: Re: How do mermaids do "the nasty" ?
Date: 1999/10/12
Message-ID: <380...@callamer.com>
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References: <7tfudr$rrr4$1...@rn.area.com> <37f...@news.vossnet.net> <7toh85$2l4$2...@news.inet.tele.dk> <ej5M3.500$EU5...@server2.news.adelphia.net> <38016102@206.103.97.91> <Pine.GSO.3.95.iB1.0.991010221504.8436B-100000@vtn1>
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Newsgroups: alt.ascii-art

                    

                

            

        


        

            

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