Sloths and the History of Man
From Dave Bird---St Hippo of Augustine <dav...@xemu.demon.co.uk>
· alt.ascii-art
· 24 Oct 1996 00:00 · View full thread
· report
<h3>
#01: The History of Man Song <br>
(''El Rotundo had some clams...'') <br>
<i>tune is ''Old MacDonald Had a Farm''</i>
</h3> <br clear="all">
<b>In LRon Hubbard's book ''The Evolution of Man'', he states that we
evolved from clams, gulping shellfish called ''BooHoos'', sloths that
fell from trees, etc.</b><p>
<img alt="[O]" src="../img/alf/o.gif">LD Rotundo had some clams, As Ron
says man evolved;<br>
And they were on the path to man, As Ron says man evolved.
With a... <br>
<i>
SnapSnap here, SnapSnap there, here a Snap, there a Snap,
everywhere a SnapSnap,<br>
</i>Old Rotundo had some clams, As Ron says man evolved.
<p>
<b>Vs.2</b><br>
Boo-HOOS and weepers next we were, As Ron says man evolved;<br>
That gulped and sobbed and gasped for air, As Ron says man evolved.
With a...<br>
<i>
BooHoo here, BooHoo there, here a Boo, there a Boo,
everywhere a BooHoo;<br>
SnapSnap here, SnapSnap there, here a Snap, there a Snap,
everywhere a SnapSnap;<br>
</i>Boo-HOOS and weepers next we were, As Ron says man evolved.
<p>
<b>Vs.3</b><br>
Then were Sloths that feel from trees, As Ron says man evolved;<br>
And hung arse-upwards by their knees, As Ron says man evolved.
With a...<br>
<i>
WhoopsThud here, WhoopsThud there, here a Whoops, there a Whoops,
everywhere a WhoopsThud;<br>
BooHoo here, BooHoo there, here a Boo, there a Boo,
everywhere a BooHoo;<br>
SnapSnap here, SnapSnap there, here a Snap, there a Snap,
everywhere a SnapSnap;<br>
</i>then were Sloths that feel from trees, As Ron says man evolved.
<p>
<pre>
=-/
\ \\ / /~~ ~
\ /_ //-<_ \\ /=-//=-//=-///=-///=-/ /~~
\ / \|//-= / - ////~~~ ! {
\\ \////_ ((( ! \ _-
\ \\\// / ! " `, ! ))) ~~ \\ //
\ \\\//// /"/ |' / | |
\ |||// ! """| |"" | |
||||| |"|| \"| ! _-_
||||| "" " |"|\ /~~ ~~\
|)|(|// ! /""~\\. /" ""~, /~~ ~
||||(| ""~""""`"",~`~"!!"!" \ (
|||||| /"""""/""! "~""" "" "~", \ _- -_
|||0|| //\""!!""~"!"!"\"""/~!~, C~"~P ~~ \\ // ~
|)|(|// ! // !!"""""! "~ " !!"!! "," O o " | |
||||(| || !!"!!~!!~||" ! "" Y "" | |(__)
|||||| \\ ! ! ! `"U"' | |(oo)
|||0|| ! \\ | | \/
|||||| \\ 0)) // \\
|||||| \`-~/~
|||||| `~'
</pre>
<b>Vs.4</b><br>
Next Piltdown Man who had big teeth, As Ron says man evolved;<br>
And with those teeth he ate his wife, As Ron says man evolved.
With a...<br>
<i>
ChompChomp here, ChompChomp there, here a Chomp, there a Chomp,
everywhere a ChompChomp;<br>
WhoopsThud here, WhoopsThud there, here a Whoops, there a Whoops,
everywhere a WhoopsThud;<br>
BooHoo here, BooHoo there, here a Boo, there a Boo,
everywhere a BooHoo;<br>
SnapSnap here, SnapSnap there, here a Snap, there a Snap,
everywhere a SnapSnap;<br>
</i>Next Piltdown Man who had big teeth, As Ron says man evolved.
<p>
<b>Vs.5</b><br>
And now as Humans here we stand, As Ron says man evolved;<br>
If this lot's true then I'll be damned, As Ron says man evolved.
With a...<br>
<i>
StuffThat here, StuffThat there, here a Stuff, there a Stuff,
everywhere a StuffThat; <br>
ChompChomp here, ChompChomp there, here a Chomp, there a Chomp,
everywhere a ChompChomp;<br>
WhoopsThud here, WhoopsThud there, here a Whoops, there a Whoops,
everywhere a WhoopsThud;<br>
BooHoo here, BooHoo there, here a Boo, there a Boo,
everywhere a BooHoo;<br>
SnapSnap here, SnapSnap there, here a Snap, there a Snap,
everywhere a SnapSnap;<br>
</i>And now as Humans here we stand, AS RON SAYS....MAN E...VOLVED.
2 --- 3 --- 4 ----
<pre>
Snap---why do those clams go Snap, Snapitty SnapSnap snap,
Snapitty snap, on the seashore, yoddom-de-dom,
Oh, Snap---why do those clams go Snap, Snapitty SnapSnap snap,
Snapitty snap, on the seashore?
There's boohhos-and weepers-and
all-sorts-of creatures-from
which-Elron says-we-e---------volved;
With engram-from seaweed,oh
what-more-could we-need,but
O-Ts-that give-us-a cold?
Oh, Snap why do those clams go Snap, Snapitty SnapSnap snap, Snapitty
snap, on the seashore, yoddom-de-dom,
Oh, Snap---why do those clams go Snap, Snapitty SnapSnap snap,
Snapitty snap, on the seashore?
<i>
((*) snap heavily with hinged white toilet seat, dustbin lids, metal
casserole or whatever...or, failing that, make a snapping sign with
thumb & forefinger)
</i>
All-the little cults have their own tricks, like
selling the Watchtow'r for Jehovah's wits:
the Mormons morm and the Shakers shake;
the Moonies moon and the Quakers quake, but...
....Snap---why do those clams go Snap, Snapitty SnapSnap snap, Snapitty
snap, on the seashore, yoddom-de-dom,
Oh, Snap---why do those clams go Snap, Snapitty SnapSnap snap, Snapitty
snap, on the seashore?
Oh, down-at-the dem-o--please
tid-y--your hair-do--and
be-sure-to straighten-your tie;
There's always--Sci------ay-nos----who
like--tak-ing pho-tos---to
make-sure-you're <b>I</b>-den-ti----fied!
Oh, Snap<i>(click(*))</i>why do those clams go Snap, Snapitty SnapSnap
snap, Snapitty snap, with a camera, yoddom-de-dom,
Oh, Snap---why do those clams go Snap, Snapitty SnapSnap snap, Snapitty
snap, ON......THE.........SEA----SHORE?
yoddom-de-doddom-de-DOM (BOM!)
--
Regards, Woof Woof, Glug Glug--
X E M U * Who Drowned theJUDGe's Dog ?
s p 4 \ |\ answers on ( alt.religion.scientology
/~~~~~~~ @----, and on page (/clam/faq/woofglug.html
-;'^';,_,-;^; : : : : : : http://www.xemu.demon.co.uk/index.html
_____________________________________*****_<--server has changed___
OT8 Cognition:"Source is the 8th Dynamic"[LRon Hubbard is God]BWAAH!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
Original message headers
X-Google-Language: ENGLISH,ASCII-7-bit X-Google-Thread: 10ac39,454fe46bbe747b99,start X-Google-Attributes: gid10ac39,public X-Google-Thread: 10bfc7,454fe46bbe747b99,start X-Google-Attributes: gid10bfc7,public X-Google-Thread: f996b,461c722d43f8e6ad X-Google-Attributes: gidf996b,public From: Dave Bird---St Hippo of Augustine <dav...@xemu.demon.co.uk> Subject: Sloths and the History of Man Date: 1996/10/24 Message-ID: <jyC...@xemu.demon.co.uk> X-Deja-AN: 191887702 distribution: world x-nntp-posting-host: xemu.demon.co.uk references: <vIU...@g8sbs.demon.co.uk> organization: 1st Canine Chapel of Bob Dobbs Dog (Church of the SubGenius) mime-version: 1.0 newsgroups: alt.ascii-art,alt.fan.lemurs,alt.religion.scientology
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