VITAL INFORMATION!
-----------------------------------------------------------------------
________________________________________________
* _____ _______ ______ __ __ ____ _____ *
* / __//__ __// __ / / \ / // __/ / __ / *
* \ ( / / / / / / / /\ \ / // /__ / /_// *
* __) \ / / / /_/ / / / \ V // __// __/ *
*/____/ /_/ /_____/ /_/ \_//____//_/\_\ *
* - MINISTRIES - *
* Sinners Repent! *
*________________________________________________*
"HI FOLKS! Reverend Stoner Joe
here, with some important
__\/___ news about the END OF
//\_____\ THE MILLENNIUM!"
/_(o)_(o)_\
(/ ___ \)
__\ '\_/' /__
/ /\_____/\ \
/ \_\<_>/_/ \
/ \/ \/ \
\ | \_/ | /
\ | o | / jro
________________________________________________
* _____ _______ ______ __ __ ____ _____ *
* / __//__ __// __ / / \ / // __/ / __ / *
* \ ( / / / / / / / /\ \ / // /__ / /_// *
* __) \ / / / /_/ / / / \ V // __// __/ *
*/____/ /_/ /_____/ /_/ \_//____//_/\_\ *
* - MINISTRIES - *
* YOU ARE DOOMED! *
*________________________________________________*
"IT'S THE END OF THE WORLD, brothers
and sisters, and YOUR ASS IS FINISHED!"
.--. __\/___ .--.
\ \/) //\_____\ (\/ /
\___/ /_(o)_(o)_\ \___/
\ \ (/ ___ \) / /
\ \_____\ '\_/' /_____/ /
\ /\_____/\ /
\______ \_\<_>/_/ ______/
| \/ \/ |
| \_/ |
| o |
________________________________________________
* _____ _______ ______ __ __ ____ _____ *
* / __//__ __// __ / / \ / // __/ / __ / *
* \ ( / / / / / / / /\ \ / // /__ / /_// *
* __) \ / / / /_/ / / / \ V // __// __/ *
*/____/ /_/ /_____/ /_/ \_//____//_/\_\ *
* - MINISTRIES - *
* THE END IS NEAR! *
*________________________________________________*
"That's right - you heard me. You
__\/___ SINFUL BASTARDS out there,
//\_____\ wallowing in SIN and CORRUPTION
/_(o)_(o)_\ don't have a snowball's chance
(/ ___ \) _ of survivin' the Millennium.."
__\ '\_/' /__ //\
/ /\_____/\ \ /\ /|
/ \_\<_>/_/ \/ \/
/ | \/ \/ | / /
\ | \_/ |\ /
\ | o | \__/ jro
________________________________________________
* _____ _______ ______ __ __ ____ _____ *
* / __//__ __// __ / / \ / // __/ / __ / *
* \ ( / / / / / / / /\ \ / // /__ / /_// *
* __) \ / / / /_/ / / / \ V // __// __/ *
*/____/ /_/ /_____/ /_/ \_//____//_/\_\ *
* MINISTRIES *
* SALVATION - GUARANTEED! *
*________________________________________________*
"UNLESS - You're smart enough to call now - WHILE
THERE'S STILL TIME! For a mere $5, I am pleased
to announce that due to a Special Dispensation
offered through our Ministry, DIRECT from the
ALMIGHTY HIMSELF, I can GUARANTEE YOU WILL BE SAVED!"
__\/___
//\_____\
/_(o)_(o)_\ _
(/ ___ \) //
__\ '\_/' /__ //\
/ /\_____/\ \ /\ /|
/ \_\<_>/_/ \/ \/
/ | \/ \/ | / /
\ | \_/ |\ /
\ | o | \__/ jro
________________________________________________
* _____ _______ ______ __ __ ____ _____ *
* / __//__ __// __ / / \ / // __/ / __ / *
* \ ( / / / / / / / /\ \ / // /__ / /_// *
* __) \ / / / /_/ / / / \ V // __// __/ *
*/____/ /_/ /_____/ /_/ \_//____//_/\_\ *
* MINISTRIES *
* ONLY $5 *
*________________________________________________*
"You heard right, folks! Salvation - GUARANTEED -
for ONLY FIVE DOLLARS!"
__\/___
//\_____\
/_(o)_(o)_\
_ (/ ___ \)
/\\ __\ '\_/' /__
|\ /\ / /\_____/\ \
\/ \/ \_\<_>/_/ \
\ \ | \/ \/ | \
\ /| \_/ | /
\_/ | | / jro
________________________________________________
* _____ _______ ______ __ __ ____ _____ *
* / __//__ __// __ / / \ / // __/ / __ / *
* \ ( / / / / / / / /\ \ / // /__ / /_// *
* __) \ / / / /_/ / / / \ V // __// __/ *
*/____/ /_/ /_____/ /_/ \_//____//_/\_\ *
* MINISTRIES *
* * 1-800-tok-2God * *
*________________________________________________*
"CALL NOW! You can receive IMMEDIATE FORGIVENESS,
right through our TOLL FREE service! Just choose
your method of payment, and then offer your
__\/___ ABJECT CONFESSION to the CREATOR,
//\_____\ right after you hear the beep!"
/_(o)_(o)_\ _
(/ ___ \) //
__\ '\_/' /__ //\
/ /\_____/\ \ /\ /|
/ \_\<_>/_/ \/ \/
/ | \/ \/ | / /
\ | \_/ |\ /
\ | o | \__/ jro
________________________________________________
* _____ _______ ______ __ __ ____ _____ *
* / __//__ __// __ / / \ / // __/ / __ / *
* \ ( / / / / / / / /\ \ / // /__ / /_// *
* __) \ / / / /_/ / / / \ V // __// __/ *
*/____/ /_/ /_____/ /_/ \_//____//_/\_\ *
* MINISTRIES *
* TOLL FREE! *
*________________________________________________*
"REMEMBER! This is your last chance EVER, before
the WORLD ENDS on January 31st, AT MIDNIGHT!"
__\/___
//\_____\
/_(o)_(o)_\
(/ ___ \)
__\ '\_/' /__
/ /\_____/\ \
/ \_\<_>/_/ \
/ | \/ \/ | \
\ | \_/ | /
\ | o | / jro
________________________________________________
* _____ _______ ______ __ __ ____ _____ *
* / __//__ __// __ / / \ / // __/ / __ / *
* \ ( / / / / / / / /\ \ / // /__ / /_// *
* __) \ / / / /_/ / / / \ V // __// __/ *
*/____/ /_/ /_____/ /_/ \_//____//_/\_\ *
* MINISTRIES *
* CALL NOW! CALL NOW! CALL NOW! *
*________________________________________________*
"It'll only take a few minutes, and there are so
PRECIOUS FEW LEFT! Just imagine - for a paltry
FIVE BUCKS, you'll wake up in the LOVING ARMS
OF THE LORD, the instant the APOCALYPSE HAPPENS!"
__\/___
//\_____\
/_(o)_(o)_\
(/ ___ \)
___(\______________\ '\_/' /_____________/)___
; | /\_____/\ | ;
`.__.-|____________ \_\<_>/_/ ___________|-.__.'
| \/ \/ |
| \_/ |
| o | jro
________________________________________________
* _____ _______ ______ __ __ ____ _____ *
* / __//__ __// __ / / \ / // __/ / __ / *
* \ ( / / / / / / / /\ \ / // /__ / /_// *
* __) \ / / / /_/ / / / \ V // __// __/ *
*/____/ /_/ /_____/ /_/ \_//____//_/\_\ *
* - MINISTRIES - *
* * 1-800-tok-2God * *
*________________________________________________*
"Now, if that doesn't sound like
a DEAL to YOU, then I don't
__\/___ know what would!"
//\_____\
/_(o)_(o)_\
(/ ___ \)
__\ '\_/' /__
/ /\_____/\ \
/ \_\<_>/_/ \
/ \/ \/ \
\ | \_/ | /
\ | o | / jro
________________________________________________
* _____ _______ ______ __ __ ____ _____ *
* / __//__ __// __ / / \ / // __/ / __ / *
* \ ( / / / / / / / /\ \ / // /__ / /_// *
* __) \ / / / /_/ / / / \ V // __// __/ *
*/____/ /_/ /_____/ /_/ \_//____//_/\_\ *
* MINISTRIES *
* TOLL FREE! *
*________________________________________________*
"So pull out those credit cards, cash, checks,
or money orders, and PICK UP THE PHONE!"
__\/___
//\_____\
/_(o)_(o)_\
(/ ___ \) _
__\ '\_/' /__ //\
/ /\_____/\ \ /\ /|
/ \_\<_>/_/ \/ \/
/ | \/ \/ | / /
\ | \_/ |\ /
\ | o | \__/ jro
________________________________________________
* _____ _______ ______ __ __ ____ _____ *
* / __//__ __// __ / / \ / // __/ / __ / *
* \ ( / / / / / / / /\ \ / // /__ / /_// *
* __) \ / / / /_/ / / / \ V // __// __/ *
*/____/ /_/ /_____/ /_/ \_//____//_/\_\ *
* MINISTRIES *
* CALL NOW! CALL NOW! CALL NOW! *
*________________________________________________*
"You'd best hurry, though. This
is a LIMITED TIME OFFER! If you
__\/___ don't take advantage of it -
//\_____\ SOON - I can guarantee you'll
/_(o)_(o)_\ wake up, BARKING IN HELL,
(/ ___ \) come January 1st!"
__\ '\_/' /__
/ /\_____/\ \
/ \_\<_>/_/ \
/ \/ \/ \
\ | \_/ | /
\ | o | / jro
________________________________________________
* _____ _______ ______ __ __ ____ _____ *
* / __//__ __// __ / / \ / // __/ / __ / *
* \ ( / / / / / / / /\ \ / // /__ / /_// *
* __) \ / / / /_/ / / / \ V // __// __/ *
*/____/ /_/ /_____/ /_/ \_//____//_/\_\ *
* - MINISTRIES - *
* Sinners Repent! *
*________________________________________________*
"Thankyou for your attention.
__\/___ We now return you suckers to
//\_____\ your regularly scheduled pro-
/_(o)_(o)_\ gramming of filth, smut, and
(/ ___ \) vile depravity, wishing you
__\ '\_/' /__ a good evening, and reminding
/ /\_____/\ \ you that the LAKE OF FIRE
/ \_\<_>/_/ \ is READY & WAITING for
| \/ \/ | YOUR sorry ass!"
| | \_/ | |
| | o | | jro
--
Jonathon R. Oglesbee
oglesbee@
mail.fullnet.net
Sent via Deja.com http://www.deja.com/
Before you buy.
Original message headers
X-Google-Language: ENGLISH,ASCII-7-bit X-Google-Thread: f996b,15e1c0b23268507d,start X-Google-Attributes: gidf996b,public From: JRO <twe...@my-deja.com> Subject: VITAL INFORMATION! Date: 1999/12/18 Message-ID: <83f0ep$ras$1...@nnrp1.deja.com> X-Deja-AN: 562160758 X-Http-Proxy: 1.1 x37.deja.com:80 (Squid/1.1.22) for client 216.226.27.39 Organization: Deja.com - Before you buy. X-Article-Creation-Date: Sat Dec 18 03:52:58 1999 GMT X-MyDeja-Info: XMYDJUIDtwelfwisp Reply-To: ogl...@mail.fullnet.net-remove Newsgroups: alt.ascii-art X-Http-User-Agent: Mozilla/4.0 (compatible; MSIE 5.0; Windows 95; DigExt)
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