Re: She left me and I could do anything for her happiness...

On Mon, 03 Feb 2003 20:57:12 -0600, Gerald Clough <clo...@texas.net>
wrote:

>>     It won't be better... You know, being with her was like touching a
>> heaven 24/7... She was completly oposite to the girls I've been ever
>> since, she was a... She was a perfect goddess. And I'm not talking
>> only about her presence... I mean... That the 6 months I spend with
>> her was the best time in my live ever. And I am sure I will never fell
>> this again with another woman. As a matter of fact I don't wan't to.
>> There is noone who can be compared to her... :((( I love her so much I
>> could do everything for her... I was doing everything for her, and
>> now... Now I'm alone and she says that this is better for us both even
>> though be both suffer... I love her and cannot stand the pain of being
>> without her and she suffers cause she knows she gave that pain to
>> me... :((( Damn! I really, really LOVE her!
>
>Here's the truth. Even if you don't buy it, think about it until you at 
>least see the point.
>
>It very, very likely *will* get better. If it doesn't get better, then 
>she definitely was right.

    Well maybe... But do you know why she did it? Let's just say that
about ten months ago she was catching up with a guy (for three months)
who had left her. When they were together she was blooming - almost
never seen her shining like that after. When they broke up (in that
point I mean when "he left her" for another woman) she was broke. In
time she got better... And here I am, I showed up and gave her love,
she never had before. Love that strong, that I was doing everything
for her to make her life easier and happier (dishwashing, bringing her
breakfast and coffe/tea to bed, huging her when she was sad, giving
her "pleasure", etc.). She was... No! She is the most important thing
that had happend to my life. And now she's gone... Wanna know why?
Beacuse she felt bad about not being able to love as much as I loved
her. In other words I loved her, she loved me, but she thought that I
deserve more... Did I ask for more? No... Well and she said that she
doesn't really got over the guy who left her. I mean she doesn't love
him anymore, she just said that she won't be able (never) to love me
the love she loved him... So... I'm in love with a girl who had left
me and propably won't get back to me (never). I suffer. She suffers
cause she gave me real big pain when droping me off - you know, I'm
kind of a sensitive guy (seriously!). I love her and will never stop
loving her... She was a gift from the skies, a gift I had lost... :(((

>She sounds like quite a courageous woman. She's trying to do something 
>good for you, even though it was painful for her, and she had to do it 
>for herself. What you do with that opportunity is up to you. She's done 
>her bit.
>
>See if you can come to a personal understnading of my sig line below. I 
>could give you my run-down on it, but it's better if you work it out for 
>yourself.
>
>Here's a hint: You say you can't be happy without her. That's demanding 
>too much of her. Only when you can be happy alone are you fit to be with 
>another.

    Right now I cannot be happy without her. But that is not
important. The only important thing is I want her to be happy. So if
she's happy without me - OK, I'll suffer, I had suffer many times
before so even though it is the biggest pain I had ever felt I will be
in a strange way happy beacuse of her happines. But if she left me and
won't be happy I will feel like worst. Why? Beacuse even though she
didn't love me as much as I did love her, she was happy with me, she
told that to me (many, many times). You know what... I'm really sad
and I don't want to continue this crying about her... The only thing I
can feel right now is huge pain - that's all... :(((

    b.

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