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 .-.     _      ______    | |  | | | |  __/    ____
(   `. .' )    |  ____|   |_|  |_| |_|\___|   |  _ \
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   |   |       |  __| | | | '_ \| '_ \| | | | |  _ < / _ \| '_ \ / _ \
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   | 66|_      |_|   \__,_|_| |_|_| |_|\__, | |____/ \___/|_| |_|\___|
   |  ,__)                              __/ |                         
   |(,_|                               |___/
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   | \_,       This is a sample of the humor and art of The Funny Bone,
   |   |       a free weekly e-mailing of jokes and funny stories, il-
   |   |       lustrated with the original ASCII artwork of Joan Stark.
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 A Catholic minister went into deepest Africa in an attempt to work with
 and convert the tribe to the Catholic religion. He wasn't able to speak
 the language very well, so he hired a member of the tribe to translate
 what he wanted to say to the tribe.  He asked for and received per-
 mission from the Chief of the tribe, to speak to the whole tribal pop-
 ulation at once.  He got up on a very large boulder that overlooked the
 central area of the tribal village.  As he spoke, his translator was by
 his side on the boulder, and he translated all that the minister was
 saying.
              \\\\\//////         "If you let me- I will show you how 
             \\\\\\//////         to dig in the ground and get good
            [[[[[[[]]]]]]]]       water to drink and cook with".  
            /////////\\\\\\       "Hoon-gow-wa!"  was the large
    /\     //// ~0 ( 0~ \\\\      response from the tribespeople.
   /  \    //(,  8-_\-8 ,)\\      
  /    \    //|\ .===. /|\\       "I can show you how you can capture 
  |/||\|       \ '===' /*         animals without leaving your village".
    ||          \__.__/           "Hoon-gow-wa" shouted all the tribe!!
 _.=||=._   .---'@   @'---.       (By this time-the minister was very
 /| || |\  /     '@ @'     \      happy with his effort)
   _||_   /    .   Y   .  _/\     
  /  _))-'  /|'---{@}---'|\_/\    "And if you will let me- I will show 
  |  _)  _.' |   --:--   | \  \   you a way to make peace with the other
  \___)-'    |   --:--   |  \  \  tribes that are trying to take your 
    ||       ;   --:--   ;  /  /  land and your women".  "HOON-GOW-WA" 
    ||        \____.____/  /  /   was the enormous response, that was 
    ||      .{{{{{{{{}}}}}/ /`    so loud, that it scared away the wild
    ||      {{{{{{{{{{{{{}} |     birds in the nearby trees!  
    ||      {}}}}}}}}}}}}}}_/     
    ||      {{{{{{{{{{{{{{}       This was the end of his talk and he
    ||      {}}}}}}}}}}}}}}       was a large feast and much dancing. 
    ||      '{}}}}}}}}}}}}'       The minister was well received by the
    ||         |   |   |          tribe-indeed!   Later that afternoon,
    ||         |   |   |          the translator came up to the minister
    ||         |   |   |          and said "The Chief of our people said
    ||         |   |   |          that you have given him much joy. As
    ||         |'-'|'-'|          a sign of his appreciation, he would
    ||         |   |   |          like to take you on a tour of animals
    ||         |   |   |          and tribal land".
    ||         |___|   |           
    ||         (___)   }          Well, the Minister was absolutely 
    ||         /   |   \          delighted at the acceptance that he 
jgs ||        (oooO Oooo)         had been shown! He thanked the Chief 
                                  and told him that he felt honored by
 the Chiefs offer. So the Chief, Minister, translator, and four warriors
 went walking through the small kingdom.  As the Chief gave the minister
 the guided tour, the translator explained the different places that the
 Chief was showing the minister.  He was shown a large sparkling stream-
 that was their water source.  They  all walked up a steep knoll that
 overlooked a large area that was bountiful in deer & elk- that was the
 meat supply.  Then after another hour of walking, the party came on a
 very large lush green pasture that looked to have about a 100 cows (to
 the best guess of the Minister), the Chief said something to the trans-
 lator and pointed, and the Minister asked "What did he say?"

 "My Chief tells you to watch your step on this path, and to be careful
 not to step in the Hoon-Gow-Wa".

                                                             _     .-. 
           John Nunley <jok...@funnybone.com>           ( `. .'   )
                                                             `. `   /'
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                                                             (__,  |
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